Please be honest
by: St.JoeMoI dropped out of rush because, to be honest, I wasn't happy with the houses that were still in consideration. I couldn't see myself in any of them. Big mistake: I have since learned that at least two of them would probably have been a good fit and I would have been proud to be part of their sisterhoods. So what do you recommend at this point? Spring recruitment, COB, formal rush next fall. Or am I just screwed?
#1by: options
Do try COB first. Your best bet is to get to know members in sororities, especially the two you mentioned that were interested in you before you dropped out. Let them know you are interested in a bid because there will be openings after December graduation. There is no actual spring recruitment, it's just COB, and houses often already know who they want and don't announce they are looking or hold events; it's not really an open process like formal recruitment. If COB doesn't work out then formal recruitment again in the spring, and you should do much better now that your mind is more open. It's important to keep your grades up, at least 3.5, higher is better.
Comment#2by: Hmmmm....
Attitude is everything. I'm not sure I would recommend working on friendships within houses that interest you because who wants to join a house that is just made up of friends of friends. We all know those houses. They're the ones who are full of cliques. But if it happens organically, don't shy away. It's also not very easy to get into a good house during formal as a soph, nor would you necessarily want to live in the house with a bunch of girls who are a year younger than you. So I guess you could continue to keep an open mind, spend time with sorority members who live on your dorm floor and are in your classes, possibly check with panhell about houses that are COBing and, if all else fails, consider formal rush next fall. I guess this is why people say to not let others' judgment and opinion determine what you think of how recruitment is going. Trust yourself instead.
by: My View
Hmmmm is right. Houses that recruit only friends during COB tend to be cliquey and, frankly, houses that do a lot of COBing, rather than just every once in awhile, aren't great houses any way. The more stable/desirable houses are the ones that seldom COB. Plus if a house is COBing to fill just a couple of vacancies, that house might not be on firm financial footing. This is what I would do. make sure your grades are excellent (3.8 or above), get involved in activities with leadership roles and go through formal next year. Decide in advance which houses you will consider and face the fact that sorority life might not be for you. That's OK, actually, because you have some work to do on your confidence and trusting yourself. There are lots of ways to make friends in college. Don't forget that.
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by: haha
You just replied to your own comment LOL. It's very obvious you aren't a sorority member.
There is no difference in joining a sorority and making friends within it vs making friends with sorority members and then joining BECAUSE YOU LIKE EACH OTHER. ALL houses COB, some have only a few openings and offer bids quietly, others need more members and so they need to actively rush for them. Sorority nationals strongly encourage COB to keep memberships at whatever Campus Total is set to, and some nationals require it. Don't listen to the financial footing BS from someone who doesn't know what they're talking about.
If you think you'd be a fit with a few houses then go for COB. It is hard to get a bid here in formal recruitment as a non-freshman but if you don't get a COB and go through formal again, your chances are better if you have made friends in sororities.
And guess what, sorority girls have friends outside their own sororities. Wow. You can make friends in many different sororities and keep them as friends after joining one of them. Again wow. Make friends with sorority members and get a bid and have friends!
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by: ^
None of this makes any sense. Of course you need to make friends in sororities if you want a good chance for a bid after formal recruitment, or if you are not a freshman. That's how you get a COB or a bid during formal. Don't wait for panhellenic to tell you if sororities are doing COB or rely on them for info, that's second hand. Deal directly with the chapters as a friend of members and express interest directly to them. Also living in the house is FUN and a year's difference does not matter in the least because you are with your member class, who are your close friends.
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