Is this for me
by: Really conflictedI’m struggling with the fact that so many girls in my dorm were crying and devastated by cuts this week. It’s been such a hard week for a few of them and they are really nice, pretty & fun girls and idk why they were cut so hard. I’m at the point of dropping not because I don’t like my 2 pref houses but I can’t imagine going through this next year & having to cut girls knowing how it’s been for these girls this year. I’m really, really sad about it. Recruitment isn’t anything like I thought it would be. I guess I thought we as PNMs would have more of a choice in houses and we’d get to know more girls than we have. (I know part of that is the virtual thing.) I didn’t expect to feel this sad either—again, I’m fine with MY choices-but just watching it all this week has been so terrible. I don’t know if I want to be a part of something that makes girls feel this worthless.
Comment#2 by: Hey
It’s a really tough week and I appreciate that you are so compassionate and sympathetic but unfortunately that’s just a part of the process. I think you should realize how lucky you are and your self worth and maybe make a difference in the chapter you choose! Make it your goal to meet as many people as you can and to love more girls. I know that sounds cliche but not opening yourself up to that opportunity would hold you back from spreading love.
#3 by: same
i completely understand where you’re coming from. i don’t agree with the recruitment process at all. it goes against my personal values and i wish things would change. i’m really hoping one day they will. i do love the friends i’ve made in my sorority, however! i think the best thing you can do is try out sorority life and see if it’s right for you. try to make some friends and see how you feel. if you’re still feeling icky (i know i still do at times) than you can drop and devote yourself to something that makes you truly happy. but i think that you’ll find amazing girls in every sorority here at A&M, and hopefully those girls can inspire you to become your best self!
by: Really conflicted Aug 15, 2020 4:47:34 PM
Thank you so much for saying that. It really helps to know that I’m not the only one feeling icky! I guess what I want to know is that the recruitment environment just feels so judgmental in like all of the worst ways. But I also see - and NOT just from stuff said on this site- that the sororities here are like that towards some of the other chapters too-really judging for all the wrong reasons & there just seems to be rumor and gossip everywhere. I’m really, really against that personally. If that is what sororities are really like, then I know it’s not for me. So I’m really just looking for insight into that part of it also. Is this just how it is or maybe I’m just missing something?
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by: sameAug 15, 2020 7:38:59 PM
i think it really depends on who you talk to! i know personally that i almost never deal with that kind of drama, and neither do my friends. there are a lot more drama-free girls in sororities than it looks like; GR is just misleading and brings out the worst in people. i think for the most part sororities are friendly with each other and strive to empower women, but that’s just my experience!
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#4 by: :(
Hopefully those girls will end up with homes they love, I promise you that cuts may seem ruthless and cruel but most girls really do find there home. When I went through I Didn’t know why I was being cut so hard by houses when I had a good resume etc but after recruitment I got to know the houses a bit better and I realized that I wasn’t really a personality fit for the chapters I was cut from.
#6 by: Sad
Girl I hear this so much!! It’s really easy to just say “trust the process” but let’s be honest for a sec and acknowledge that the process fails some girls big time. The system is far from perfect and you have to be a strong b— to even want to put yourself through it. Everyone has to decide for themselves if it is worth it. For me it was, but last year I knew lots of girls who dropped recruitment for the very reasons you said. Everything worked out fine for them too outside of Greek life. My advice is to accept your bid & give it a try, especially if you liked the houses you preffed. If you give it time you will know if it is really for you or not. Sorry your friends had it so rough & hope they land somewhere they can feel like they are welcomed.
#7 by: ds
ALL the girls going through recruitment are beautiful, smart and great girls. You can't find a place in every sorority for over 1300 girls. You have to treat it sorta like a business. take the emotions out. its ok to be cut...you can't be invited to all the sororities. Stay in see what happens. What do you have to lose?
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by: Really conflictedAug 15, 2020 3:13:34 PM
I know that but the judgement is what I’m having trouble with—both within recruitment & just otherwise. I’m seeing posts about this chapter or another being better or worse and it makes me think that this is just the environment in Greek life. I don’t think it needs to be like that, which makes me think maybe I don’t want it. But then I feel like I’ll have regrets. I just don’t know.
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