read this

- The houses do the choosing. No matter how high a pnm ranks a certain sorority, the decision to be invited back is up to the house. The houses do not see pnm’s ranks, so how much a pnm wants a house is not a factor in their decision. A pnm’s ranks only come into play IF more houses would invite her back than there is room on her schedule. In that case her lowest ranked house(s) would come off. But the reality is that she will be released from houses she ranks higher, so the houses she ranks lower will remain on her schedule to keep her having as many choices as possible.

- Houses must make a certain percentage of releases each round. When a pnm is released from a house that she loves, it doesn’t mean they didn’t like her, it just means other girls were higher in priority for a variety of reasons. Legacies are released all the time. It is hard to take, but she should focus on the houses that want her back and not dwell on the others.

- It is each sorority’s job during recruitment to make pnm’s feel welcome and desired. If a pnm is told by a member that they are so glad to see her back today, or that they really loved talking to her, or they hope to see her back again, this is very likely true on the part of that member, but it should not be construed as a promise for another invitation. As much as a member likes a pnm and encourages her to like her house, that does not mean the pnm is “in.” Individual members do not speak for their chapter as a whole, and members being nice does not equate to bid promising.

- The computer does not make mistakes. If you hear a rumor that this happened, it is because it is used as an excuse for one of three reasons: released pnm’s (and their moms) say this to save face when they are released from certain houses; members sometimes say this to get people off their back who demand to know why a certain pnm was released from their house; alumnae say this when they don’t understand the process. The computer algorithm does not make mistakes and the sororities are laser-focused on their membership selection so there is nothing left to chance at any stage.

- There are no bad houses, and each house deserves a chance. Pnm’s released from houses where they had their heart set should be encouraged to stay with the process and not make any hasty emotional decisions about dropping. Any pnm who has two houses at pref should be prepared for getting her number two choice and accepting that bid with as full a heart as possible. The bid comes from the house that wants the pnm more, so she should focus on where she is wanted the most. Putting down only one choice after pref (suiciding) will not help a pnm get her number one house, and if that one house doesn’t choose her then she will not get a bid at all. Better to rank both houses and be ready to give that number two a real try.

Hope this helps.