is kappa really exclusive?

This girl you know probably had a connection she doesn't know about. Don't worry about which homes are more 'selective' and think toward joining a home whose women make you feel comfortable and accepted. The world is full of all possibilities.

This pertains to Kappa, XO, DDD, and other "exclusive" Southern houses. This site likes to make a big deal out of needing connections and being in-state to get into these kinds of houses. The truth is, the Alabama girls in these sororities are wealthy cream-of-the-crop types with good grades. There are thousands of Alabama girls rushing, but only 200 or 300 are Mountain Brook, Mobile, Montgomery girls. These wealthy Alabama girls have a lot more in common with someone of similar socioeconomic standing from Oklahoma or Maryland than with working-class girls from in-state.

All you need as OOS is good grades, clean reputation, and enough money for the "basic white girl" lifestyle. You have to understand that Alabama-wealthy is just middle class for many, many people. For example, I'm from a suburb of Houston that's known as nice, but not particularly wealthy or prestigious. I only personally knew one girl in Tri delta, but I went to pref with DDD, Kappa, and my own sorority. There's nothing you can do about being OOS and not having connections, so all you can do now is keeping your last semester's grades up, enjoying your time with your friends (Instagram matters), and working out/learning how to put on makeup. Good luck.

Despite Kappa's reputation as a top house, they are one of the least "exclusive" Old Row houses. So to answer your question, yes, it is entirely possible to be an average girl from OOS and get into a top house if you have a decent reputation and grades. Some of them care more about in state girls or at least pulling southern girls. And like someone else said, middle class in your state may not be middle class in Alabama. Remember that Alabama is actually a poorer state, so if your family is "middle class" in a state like Connecticut, they probably wouldn't be middle class down here.

Kappa and Alpha Gam are the two least exclusive Old Row houses. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but those two are traditionally the easiest to get into.

If you want an easy ticket into an old row house, KKG and AGD are it. Hardest to get into are AXO, XO and PM.

It's more important to find a house that values you and where the girls want you for a sister. If you are just being recruited for your bank account and zip code, you're probably not going to find a very warm sisterhood. If you choose a house because it's old row and filled with Alabama girls whose families have know each other for 200 years, you're not likely to form lifelong friends. I'm not saying it's impossible, but I know many oos girls who love the sorority they're in because there are a lot of other oos girls. I know oos girls in old row houses that are miserable.

Please don't fill up the rest of the page about how you're from out of state and you JUST LOVE your old row house. No one is buying it. There may be a few happy oos old row girls but not all that many.

All the comments above are good and accurate (for a change on GR). The thing about old row houses and in-state pnms is this: the connections are more a key for in-state girls than OOS. In some ways it is easier to get a bid if you are OOS and have a strong recruitment because things like high-school mean girls declaring you "not a good fit" are a lot less. This is because you are less likely to have an in-state same school mean girl lurking if you are OOS. The down side to being OOS in terms of old row is that they are less likely to take a grade risk on you and more likely to judge you based on your appearance and style, etc.

Kappa isn't that exclusive. I know some pretty unattractive/weird girls in the most recent pledge class from places like Indiana, Michigan, Massachusetts, Colorado, etc.
You can definitely still get a bid to a house like Kappa if you're not from the South. You'll meet girls in every house though that you will seriously wonder how they got a bid. It's not just Kappa.

Kappa is not that exclusive. They self-rank a lot on here but they're not a top house. No better than a house like KD.