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really confused about drops

by: PNM   

Ok, so our Rho Chis told us that we were ranking houses, not cutting them, but they also said that we should put the houses that we didn't want to see again in our bottom 4. I did that. Then, this morning, I realized that I had to go to my #2 and #3 again. Thank God I had enough of my top 12 invite me back that I don't have to go back to my #4 or #5. But I really can't see myself in #2 or #3. I just don't feel like I fit in with the girls at all...they are socially awkward, not pretty, and just weird and desperate. I'm hoping that when we go down to 8, I can cut them for good...but I don't know which other 2 houses to cut because I love 10 of the 12 I have for this round. Anyway, a girl in my group told me to tell 2 and 3 "thanks but no thanks, I don't think I belong in this house and I'm hoping for a better house". Is this good advice? I was embarrassed about even being seen at these houses again because I was afraid people would think I actually picked them 😠

Posted By: PNM
Page 1 of 3
#1by: Baby    
#1    

NOOOO.
You are closing your mind and stop this.
You will be fine.
Play it straight.
Trust the process.
That line to the awkward girls in the houses you don't like could and probably would bite you later.
Girls talk.
Particularly when offended.

Shockingly bad advice.

By: Baby

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#2by: Another PNM    
#2    

You have a full schedule!! You should be so excited about that, bc there are a lot of us who wish we had that many left. You got 10 of your top 12...like that is really good and again, most girls would be thrilled about that. And you're upset that you have to go back to your top 2 of your bottom 4? Really girl, it's not that big of a deal. And NO I wouldn't say anything mean like that to any house!! All of the houses are trying really hard to make this a fun week for us, and we should be respectful and kind to the girls in every house. Just try to drop them again this round, but if you get invited back again, maybe you're meant to be in one of those houses. ALL of the houses here are great! I will be honored to get a bid from any of them, honestly.

By: Another PNM
by: Hello   

Right attitude! Good luck, girl!

By: Hello
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#3by: advice   
#3    

I am tempted to say go for it. Someone with such bad manners really doesn't belong in any house and that's exactly what will happen if you do that. Believe it or not, those houses that you think are so far beneath you are full of girls that are great friends with the girls in the houses you see yourself fitting in. So believe me, they're going to call them as soon as you leave and let them know what a jerk you are. I have personally gotten calls like this and my house dropped those girls immediately. No house is interested in girls who think they're too good for our friends.

You probably don't believe this, but the only thing holding you back from fitting into a house is YOU. There are lots of girls in each house that you have a lot in common with. You're not going to be best friends with every girl in any house -- that requires an investment of effort and time. If you can dismiss an entire house after meeting a few girls during IWTs, you probably don't have the social skills to fit in to any house.

So yeah, I'm torn between feeling very sorry for you and wanting to protect a house from inadvertently thinking you'd be a good sister. But the truth is, you probably don't belong in a house here.

By: advice
#4by: ughghg   
#4    

Baby is right. Sabotage from the other girl? If you run down the other sororities, the convo will get around... those things get talked about at ranking and someone knows someone in all the other sororities..... DON'T and be open. You may change your mind.

By: ughghg
by: ...   

I doubt it would be sabotage. Birds of a feather flock together, as they say. Look, there are houses here filled with members that were PNMs just like the OP when they went through. It most likely will end well for this young lady. But for other PNMs that are shocked that girl with so many good parties and so little to complain about would actually consider telling houses "thanks but no thanks" -- you should be shocked. But girls like this are in houses here. Part of your job is finding them and if you are not like that, then don't keep putting them on your lists high just because of greekrank or what friends think or whatnot. This is where you start making YOUR OWN DECISIONS.

Have a great day.

By: ...
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#5by: Wth?   
#5    

I agree with whoa...... You should be honored to get a bid from any house at Bama. We have one of the best Greek systems in the country and its a privilege to be here.
Hoping you don't pledge my house!

By: Wth?
#6by: K   
#6    

So if you REALLY don't want to go back next round, why don't you just tell us which 2 houses you think you're way too good for. It will save you the "embarrassment" of having to go back again ;)

By: K
#7by: ...   
#7    

OK. Reality check. You got released first round by two houses you really think are good enough for you. You have a high opinion of yourself. That is fine. But the fact you got released and could not shake a few from your schedule should be a signal that you may not be the quality PNM you believe you are. Take a dose of humility, find the good in everyone you meet. If you are unable to find the good in people, you really should reconsider why you are going through recruitment.

By: ...
#8by: Wow   
#8    

Speechless

By: Wow
#9by: SLayer   
#9    

I am in one of your top eight too.
You are obviously very social, stylish and are likely pretty.
What you are not is humble or compassionate. Two important qualities in a PNM.
Your choices place you in the middle of what 90 percent want at this point.
What is offending me on this thread is your attitude about the events and causes. Your candor and inattention to political correctness also means you have a defiant streak.
Some of your choices will stifle that. Others will not.
You really should check yourself and work this year to devolve a sense of compassion.

By: SLayer
#10by: Yep   
#10    

How much do y'all want to bet that she will still be going back to some or all of those 4 houses during the next round?

By: Yep
by: SLayer   

I would say definitely

By: SLayer
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by: Me   

Hopefully they got a whiff of her arrogance today and will go ahead a cut her! Wouldn't that be funny!

By: Me
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