dropping
by: 123
I actually only got invited back to Gamma Phi although I feel like I had incredible conversations at three of my other houses. I was shook when none of them wanted me and I'm very confused on the imperfect processes. Can I get a show of hands of those in similar position as me?
Also, to be clear this post does not mean to indicate any tone of superiority above any houses. I just simply thought that after hearing stories of girls who "found their home the time they stepped into the house" I would find mine too. However, this feeling obviously isn't mutual. I feel like at the end of the day it just boils down to Berkeley having too many people and the chapters just had to make cuts. On the other side, it was evident that a KKG was telling her sister during Unity Day how the pledge class was "already chosen" so what was the point.
I didn't come in wanting a particular house, I was rejected by 7 out of the 12 from the first round, and I'm not being selective. Now, it just boiled down to one, and I didn't find genuine connection here so I'm dropping. There won't be another chance as I am a junior, but it was still interesting to go through the process and see its faults.
That's my story, and I want to hear some of others who felt the same way, or perhaps with a different perspective.
#1by: Not yet
keep in mind that some chapters will do continuous open bidding (give out more bids as girls from their pledge class don’t accept or drop), so there will be opportunities available if you look for them. I don’t think it would be inappropriate for you to send emails to membership vps of chapters you would be on snap bidding to expressing your continued interest in the chapter should they have spots to fill (though just word it carefully). Or if you have any friends in chapters you like, keep in touch with them. FFR definitely an imperfect process, and I’m sorry it didn’t work for you.
It’s also totally ok and normal to do spring recruitment as a junior! Plus there are people who do rush as seniors.
#2by: Same Story
I am on the exact same boat. I came into recruitment with no expectations and had an open mind all throughout. Although there are some houses that I really liked, I got dropped from all of them and Gamma Phi was the only house that invited me back. It does suck because you really don't know how the girls are judging you. I was also like you and didn't really feel like there was a place for me.
#4by: nic
What makes me sad about reading this similar posts about GPhi is that if some of the people that got a bid from GPhi thought about the future instead of just today then there might be a shot to save this house and build our community. GPhi nationally is an incredible organization and the opportunity exists to build a wonderful sisterhood here at Cal. But if people just keep thinking about how things are today then nothing with this house will ever change IMO. There is a huge opportunity for a group of like minded strong women to join this house and build it OVER TIME into something that our system needs which is another strong house. Building a chapter takes time and I have been watching now for 4 years when people say no to GPhi. By saying NO to GPhi you are saying NO to Greeklife at Cal. You had an option and your choice was to turn it down. Our system needs ever house to be strong. People say they came to recruitment with an open mind but if you turn down your last option then your mind is not open IT IS CLOSED! We have too few spots and simply too many people. If we lose GPhi then our system becomes WEAKER AND NOT STRONGER. This typical 'me me me' and 'all about today' thinking will bring down GPhi and make recruitment next year even worse especially if we lose at least one other house which seems highly likely. Totally pathetic. I have been watching this for 4 years and every year gets worse as more people drop early and complain and then say they were open minded.
#6by: up
To @pippa. Options to revise the rules have been debated endlessly with no changes unfortunately. I am personally not sold on the idea that if someone maximizes their options they are guaranteed a bid has any value any more as people are dropping with bids in hand. We still have houses that don't meet quota and then turn around and use COB to try to fill the gaps. We have houses that might not be here in a few years. I don't think most PNMs realize what a gift it is to them to be guaranteed a bid if they maximize options. They don't get it. These PNMs are still dropping and our system is suffering due to the drops. Other schools have a much more brutal process with no guaranteed bid. After watching this sad situation for 3 years now I think I would support no guarantee, house set quotas and a 'lord of the flies' experience for PNMs. I honestly think all the people on here that said they have 'open minds' are LYING. They don't value a greek experience so my thinking is to make it even harder to get into a house and perhaps this might save our system. GPhi plays by the rules every year and gets screwed when they deserve to get a full class. We have dirty rushing every year (Hello to the super sus ladies at APhi and the worst of the worst THIS year was PiPhi with advance contact in the weeks ahead of rush - yep, heres looking to you on Piedmont as you were terrible!) and no penalties are ever imposed. There is alot of value in a greek experience over 4 years, not the least of which is a wonderful place to live and eat, a support network and friend groups. I don't think PNMs understand that the greek experience is available at ALL the houses and not just a couple. We also need a panhel with only national panhel members. Best to the ladies of DS but they are no national and don't share our issues. Look at the composition of Panhel now. Do you honestly think there is a shot in hell of anything changing? Nope. Worse than the day I pledged.
#7by: pippa
@123 IMO you are part of the problem and not part of the solution to greek life here at cal. I am sure I met you this past week. I am sure I didn't remember you as I met over 1,000 people and very few names registered and forget remembering faces. It makes me sad to think that you believe you are above any particular house when we have solid houses across the board. It makes me sad that you can't look at what is important over the long term. Good luck in the dorms as my prediction is that you will be sitting there staring at walls and missing out on a greek experience at cal.
#8by: Cal Bear
Honestly glad you dropped. You say you're not looking down on people, but you 100% are. If you'd rather drop than give it a shot for a few weeks and see if you develop a connection, you don't deserve to be in any house. Cal needs to get rid of it's guaranteed bids, then houses could drop people with bad attitudes out entirely and the whole community would get stronger.
#9by: senior
Same thing happened to me. The PHC told me that class standing was not taken into account during rush but that was bs. I only got invited back to 3/13 houses and was eventually dropped from all but GPhi. I don't see how you can preach that Greek Life is inclusive but drop a senior without giving them a chance to return to the house to talk, at the very least. I'm just mad that I believed the PHC's lies and paid $50.
#10by: reject
Oh my gosh, I thought I was the only one. I got dropped from 7 houses too the first day too, and by the last day, by all except Gamma Phi Beta. I'm also a junior transfer. While I did like the girls in GPhiB, I knew it was not the house for me and felt so humiliated and awful having been dropped from everyone else that I just quit...honestly I think for me it was a consequence of being introverted. Since I'm introverted, I ended up having to try really hard to put myself out there and I guess I ended up sounding fake to the girls I talked to. Some houses I honestly don't know why I was dropped from them? Idk. I'm doing COB in the spring for a house I have a lot of friends in. I've heard it's much more low-key.
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by: ahh
if you didn't attend tonight's event, could you still be eligible for "continued bidding"?
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