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She needs to reach out OFFICIALLY to the chapter, not to random members. I don't know about SK but at most sororities there is a process where the chapter here would first need to verify that this person was a member in good standing and then be invited to meet the exec and other members at a few meals or some other events to see if she would be a good fit in the chapter here. Affiliation is not a gimme. NGL if some person I don't know wearing my letters came up to me and started talking to me like I should treat her as part of my chapter and asking me questions, I would 1) not be expecting it, 2) would be put off if she came off as presumptuous, 3) wonder why she didn't contact my chapter exec as soon as she knew she was coming here. Those girls likely felt exactly the same way.
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