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that's a girl that rushed 2 years in a row and can't accept that she just wouldnt fit into the houses that she wants (probably thinks she's better than bottom tier/only wants top and doesn't realize that the "bottom" houses that invited her back are still awesome houses that clearly WANT her). First, does she not realize that every girl in the chapters ALSO went through recruitment? we know how hard it is to keep your hair and makeup looking flawless. We totally get it...I was sweating soo much when I was a PNM and I still got my first choice house. No one cares if your teeth aren't pearly white. We just care if you'd fit in. It's not nearly as shallow as people make it out to be, it's just a formal way of deciding if you'd fit into a group of 200+. Second: no, it's not exactly "mutual selection". But why should it be? Why does a PNM think she knows where she belongs after a 20 minute convo better than a chapter woman who knows all of the girls in her chapter? I rushed lots of girls that I clicked with really well but I knew ultimately wouldnt fit into my chapter, they just get along with me. So we didn't invite those PNMs back. AND THATS OK. Not every girl I get along with needs to be my sister. I'm really sick of PNMs trying to pretend they know more about being in a sorority than the girls in it. Your makeup or clothes or hair or purse don't determine what house you belong in. If I don't see you getting along with someone in my chapter or see anyone in my pledge class or my little's pledge class or my grand little's pledge class taking you as their little, I'm sorry! You just aren't going to fit in and that's not mean for us to not extend you a bid: you wouldn't be happy in a chapter you don't fit into.